He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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