He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
