Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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