I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
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