ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
