tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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