There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
