i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
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