So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
