this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I would fuck him just for his dog
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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