Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
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It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.