no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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