ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Randomize
