i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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