I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize