Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
