My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
