I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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