i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
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