OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
