Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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