420 ftw
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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