Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
