Texts From Last Night

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  (614): View more from Ohio

  i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid

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  (614): i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid http://tfl.nu/y6qj
  Replies (44) Good night (4549) Bad night (706)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical

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  (973): Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical http://tfl.nu/uh4w
  Replies (141) Good night (4283) Bad night (2222)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.

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  (518): I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room. http://tfl.nu/qe4u
  Replies (22) Good night (6659) Bad night (1007)
• Favorite

  (204): View more from Manitoba

  I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.

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  (204): I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis. http://tfl.nu/t0tt
  Replies (3) Good night (3325) Bad night (971)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.

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  (609): girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her. http://tfl.nu/7glm
  Replies (15) Good night (4709) Bad night (1536)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?

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  (740): So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot? http://tfl.nu/xzhr
  Replies (16) Good night (4457) Bad night (909)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia

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  (206): I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia http://tfl.nu/go1o
  Replies (6) Good night (2650) Bad night (1198)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese

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  (208): Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese http://tfl.nu/a9is
  Replies (4) Good night (4714) Bad night (987)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?

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  (513): Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done? http://tfl.nu/t5qr
  Replies (13) Good night (2814) Bad night (989)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.

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  (509): you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever. http://tfl.nu/fzjz
  Replies (10) Good night (778) Bad night (2294)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass

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  (336): For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass http://tfl.nu/ljpj
  Replies (9) Good night (562) Bad night (1092)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.

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  (701): Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar. http://tfl.nu/j5ff
  Replies (7) Good night (1254) Bad night (524)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly

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  (401): Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly http://tfl.nu/cjgf
  Replies (2) Good night (787) Bad night (471)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.

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  (307): he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with. http://tfl.nu/pnh0
  Replies (3) Good night (645) Bad night (435)
• Favorite

  (276): View more from Virginia

  My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.

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  (276): My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today. http://tfl.nu/q8u1
  Replies (9) Good night (691) Bad night (259)

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