I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
