"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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