You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
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