Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Randomize
