He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
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