I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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