i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
