Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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