She said her name was "party"
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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