I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
