There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
