can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
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