...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
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