I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
We don't watch enough power rangers
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
