my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?