Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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