the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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