Dual....:-)
We're facebook friends in real life
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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