Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
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