Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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