Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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