omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Randomize
