my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
