i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
