This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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