Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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