would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I need to align my fucking chakras
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
