I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
21 Embarrassing Stories From Adults Who’ve Crapped Their Pants
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.