I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.